I have parents who talk to me all the time about their struggle with the question, "When should I enforce law and when should I give grace?" The problem with the question is that it treats God’s law and God’s grace as two opposing forces. 

As a young child raised in Mexico, I was submerged into the Catholic faith and its traditions. I was baptized as an infant, made confessions to the priest, but did not have a clue as to who God was. As a young teenager, my family began attending a Baptist church. I spent many confusing years trying to decipher and piece together the differences between both religions.

My life before Jesus was dark and hopeless. Looking back at my 12 year old self, I was sad and desperate; desperate for a father's love; desperate for acceptance and normalcy in my family. In my culture, if you do not have a father, you do not have a standing or place in the community. You were, to say the least, pitied and excluded.

Every culture and generation could say, "Parenting is particularly hard because…" But I think there is one thing that is particularly unique about the culture in which we live. It is the availability of things—powerful, attractive things—that distract us.

Confession is a means of God’s grace. We should not cower away but joyfully and regularly confess our sins to God and one another. As we are convicted by the Holy Spirit of sin and feel the weight of it before the face of God we ought to confess specifically that sin to Jesus and others.

Often we skip this or move to confession too quickly because of pressure from our community or the desire to promptly fix our situation. This leads us to a cycle of deception and despair because we are “repenting” of something we are not fully convinced is sin. “You have to be convinced by the Holy Spirit working through Godʼs Word that you are guilty of sin.” (Mike Wilkerson, Redemption).

Many young parents have asked the question, “When is the best time to baptize my child?” It’s an important question, and it’s an important one for both parents and church leaders to be asking. If a child says they love and trust Jesus, we must take it at face value. We know that Jesus loves children and desires to save them (Matt. 19:14), so we should be eager to welcome kids to him and baptize them. At the same time, we don’t want kids to pursue baptism simply because their parents want them to be baptized. The church is responsible to baptize only believers, those whom God has saved and changed. So, as you, parents and church ministry leaders, consider whether or not the child in your care is ready, here are seven things to keep in mind:

We fight to believe the truth about God (faith) and desire God above all other things (worship). When we ask what truths we need to turn to, weʼre not talking about knowing the right mantra about God to chant when we are faced with temptation. Saying, “God is in control,” over and over and over again will usually not stop the tide of worry and anxiety in our hearts. We must exercise faith in the greatness of God, and we must worship him as the Great One in order to win the battle against sin.

A godly marriage is one in which both husband and wife love and celebrate Christ in their hearts and relationship. In addition, both husband and wife seek daily to die to self and live for Christ. Personal agendas are submitted to God’s agenda as both spouses seek to be controlled by the Spirit of God rather than by their flesh. Neither partner clings to their “rights;” rather, they both realize that they are under the authority of God. Their unity is not based on likes and dislikes or other “compatibility” issues, but on the fact that God has joined them together. They seek harmony through “putting on the mind of Christ.” 

A godly wife submits to the headship of her husband as ordained by God, knowing that even as she does so, she is really submitting to God. She recognizes that the freest place she can be is under the authority of her husband. She “brings her husband good and not evil all the days of his life.” When her husband is in error before the Lord, she seeks to win him over by her behavior and Christ–likeness, rather than by nagging, complaining, or other verbal means. She does not grudgingly minister to her husband but does so joyfully and heartily.